Tuesday, December 23, 2014

Good Morning

I'm at the dining table typing today.

The youngest has woken up well before his allotted start time - due to a snotty head.

Watery eyes, drippy nose, lethargic.... all he wants is Mama.

And tissues.

He's getting lots of both.

When settling down to munch on breakfast - he asked me to sit with him while I write.

So I moved candle and computer into our common area here.... and the change in scenery is a welcome one, albeit loud.

I'm flanked by blondes at this point.

The oldest saw that the youngest got to get out of the gate early - so now he has joined us.

I'm sure the girl isn't far behind.

So much for my early writing time.... alone.

:)

Soak in the season, Mama. It will flee fast.

Today....the eve of Christmas eve - it's an antsy, thoughtful one.

Everyone in this house - looking forward to celebrating and eating and opening and pondering the Purpose of it all.

And allowing the gears to turn for what next year could hold, what matters and goals to fixate on, what fresh starts to forge and conquer.

For me...I've got a clear concentration.

I'm sure it will make it's way into my words throughout the year.

But for today - we will snuggle in, and read, and think, and clean up, and administer medicine, and take shelter from the elements.

It's a cool, cloudy, wet and thunderous day in these parts.

Perfect for doing those things I just mentioned above.

I hope your days leading up to Christmas and New Years - are filled with peace and direction for the coming year, friends.

Grateful for each of you.

Holiday hugs to you all.

Monday, December 15, 2014

Hello, Again

Everyone else in my house has yet to stir.

Heads are still resting on pillows and the sun won't make it's way through our windows for a while still.

I'm up, however.

I'm up...because I know that if I will have any quiet, still, unrushed moments - I have to steal them.

And I have to steal them early.

But I like it here in the initial dark hours when the day's pot has yet to be stirred.

To be the one who finds herself vertical first - to be the one to grab hold of the spoon and whirl today's contents and set it to simmer before anyone else....it boosts me.

So this pristine moment is good.

But please know....

Many times I have walked past my laptop the last few weeks...

Rushing to grab an extra diaper for the diaper bag....
Carrying a child who is learning to 'potty'...
Hoisting folded laundry to closets and drawers...
Pushing a vacuum over crumbs and litter...
Shuffling myself to my side of the bed....

Life speeds past this contraption here. Lots of life. Great life!

But as I dart around my computer handling my people and my things and my duties - I glance at the screen of this thing, and feel a strong tinge and twinge to rest and wonder and write with you in this place.

Know that.

Someone recently suggested that I just grab fifteen minutes here, and ten minutes there - to punch out my passions here. But my brain doesn't do that exactly. And my heart doesn't want to. It....wants to be seated, settled, and perched for more than a few moments - to let the words unfold. That's what feels good.

So this morning, scripting won over sleeping.

And I'm glad.

Just typing all of the above - I already feel more myself.

It's a Monday. And as mentioned - the day hasn't exactly dawned yet. And in the wee hours here - I'm thinking about the people all over the place....the New Yorkers getting ready to step down into subways, the westerners who are still in deep night, the Londoners who are already setting out to lunch. And it makes me want to join each one in each place - in each city's day pregnant with possibilities.

But I'm happy here in my suburban rent house looking out onto my dining table, while also looking out onto my next 16 hours.

As I look...

My table has a blue sippy cup of water resting on it - leftover from yesterday. It has an empty glass cup left there by a certain husband. It has my black button-up sweater draped across the middle - left there by a certain yours truly. The corner of the table has my school plans for the week, a notebook I scribble things in all day, and a group of pens and pencils ready to pour. The other corner has a tiny matchbox car resting on it - waiting for little hands to grasp and zoom.

My day has a full load of learning to carry out. We will look further at the planets today, and study spelling words, and review grammar rules (just as much for Mommy here, as for anyone else!) tackle a few math lessons - amongst a gaggle of other things. It also holds wrapping up a few Christmas to-do's, washing and drying at least one load of laundry, playing a new game a dear friend gifted to us just last night, and finding a few moments to pray and petition and dream with God between it all.

As I gird myself up just now....as the children reach the tail end of their slumber and the sun is threatening to peep...

 I ask the Creator of all things good, to simply grant us His peace and persistence and patience and yes, His presence today.

Reveal Yourself to us all this week, Lord. And let us see and discern You as we head toward the holiday.

Ah.

I feel so much better having unloaded here... after all that long wait.

See you soon. Yes, I need it to be forthwith. (Isn't that a fun word? So Jane Austen-ish.) :)

If I wait that long again - I'll either wither or burst!

Big, huge, festive, heart-felt hugs to you all.

Wednesday, December 3, 2014

Treasure

Every once in a while the itch to write, trumps all else.

I have moments where I feel such a strong beckoning to sit and scribble words, that I can't find peace doing any other thing.

Most times I can tell whether it's me - simply longing and needing to do something of my own and something for myself........and when it's God.

Today I feel like it's God.

The odd thing is, I don't really have a particular story, lesson, or epiphany burning a hole in my soul.... to share.

But out of what seems like obedience, I have positioned myself here this morning - in front of this screen....to punch something out.

Something.

Lord, I seek and accept what you want to deposit. What is it?

Just as I'm sitting here - I feel such a sweet and strong Presence, that my eyes are pooling tears and my chest feels wonderfully heavy, and I have a simple picture in my head that shows me He has something to hand out here today.

As I'm asking, I feel a tendency to strain and stretch to hear Him. But at the same time, I feel an urging to simply be calm, and open up..... and I'll receive. 

Funny, in the midst of this affectionate Presence that's filling this place - I have been interupted countless times by the earthly season I'm in.

Squabbling sibblings.
The oldest practicing his piano and wanting me to listen.
Fetching food.
Getting kids dressed.
Helping kids find certain toys.
Addressing behavior.

I've been up and down from my writing chair at least a dozen times in the last 20 minutes.

Yet, every time I come back and sit down - I feel Him.

Ah. He meets us in our seasons, in our current situations, in our now.

He knows where we are - and He can come to us there. 

He can bring His Presence to our present. Isn't that grand?

Hmm.

I have lots of tears and no words to tell you why.

But I can tell you - that it has been a hard week.

But also, I can tell you - that when my feet hit the floor this morning, I felt a surge of hope and of expectancy. An inkling, once again, that the good Lord has something great to reveal to us today.

Yes, Father. Bring it.

I've been reading through Matthew. And today's reading is from chapter 13, verse 44:

 The kingdom of heaven is like treasure hidden in a field, which a man found and covered up. Then in his joy he goes and sells all that he has and buys that field.

Up until a few years ago, I had looked at this verse as if salvation was 'the treasure', 'the man' was me and you, and that we had to go and sale everything so that we could buy what was really worthy.

That made sense to me. And it went along with other scriptures I knew.

But after listening to a very thoughtful sermon on this verse, and much pondering on the subject - I don't think that is what Jesus meant by that passage at all. 

This may sound egocentric.....but I now think He meant that 'the treasure' is us. And Christ is 'the man'. And Jesus went and 'sold' Himself on a cross to buy you and I back. 

Hear this...

You didn't have to buy anything to come into the Kingdom of God. YOU were what was bought.

You and I, the church, the field, the treasure....

According to Christ, we were worth selling everything for.

Wow! 

Find your identity in that today, friends.

Yeah. No matter where you find yourself this moment - He finds you

And you are His treasure.  

That's why He was willing to pay the cost to make you....His.

Was that it, Lord?! Was that passage what we all needed to hear from You this hour?

Yes! 

But I think there's more.

Lord, for every single person that passes by this post - please deposit something else that is lovely into their souls at some point today. Something that they know is from You. Please. Thank You that You are so good. And that You come and find us, and buy us, and unearth us, and wipe our dirt away, and place us higher. In Jesus, Amen.