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My eyes are pooling tears and my heart's pounding from the outpouring.
I'm sitting here in all out awe - over the way these people love.
There's been a lot of goodness flying in from friends today......
A card in the mail...
A text this afternoon...
Various emails.....
And a comment....
All today. All in the last 8 or so hours.
And all from these Jesus loving Texans we have jelled with over the last ten months.
All the random love that dropped into my mailbox and onto my phone and into my inbox and up on the screen.....It comes on a day where nothing in particular is weighing heavy....nothing pressing or worrisome or worthy of inducing stress.
All the undeserved sweetness arrived on a normal, everyday, kind of day....
But there has been this one thing as of late....
This one thing that my heart's been wrestling down this week....that by the looks of things needed some attention, perhaps.
The desire for purpose and accomplishment- outside of crumb-catching and bottom-wiping.
While all things home are what I am to hone in on these days (by assignment and by desire) - I can't deny there are personal dreams that dawn in my mind's eye quit regularly. Dreams that walk along side my Mama-ing...not dreams that take the place of it.
Many of which...... have been spawned and spurred by my work within these walls - while stirring dinner - while picking up littered toys and broken graham crackers - while perusing all these mounds of books that sit around every corner....
.....all with these blondes that find shelter under my wing.
Oh, these children. There's something about their wonder - their all out passion for adventure ....their fearless attempts at feats .... their insatiable longing for new paths to explore....and most importantly....
their willingness to just try.
All of that - can ignite sparks in a woman....
Little gleaming hot spots of possible endeavors...they've been coming to life lately.
As mentioned...'Mama' and 'Maker of the Home' are my main engagements - but friends..... I'd be crazy to hush some of the deep hopes that are still pulsating in these veins of mine. I may be 'Mama' but I'm still mighty when it comes to dreaming up God - inspired possibilities.
So dream I do.
Right here in the midst of the crumbs and clutter and bottoms and attitudes.
Not as an escape - but as an exercise - to keep me going.
But there comes a point.....
......where dreaming.....has to turn into doing.
There comes a time - where we stop simply entertaining things in our heads....and start walking things out in real life.
Or else our dreams and purposes never really wake up to the dawning.
So here I am today - bolstered up by all the random and thoughtful gestures bestowed on us this week - feeling a bit charged and inspired.... thinking about some long and deeply seeded dreams that might be ready to take root and blossom in the near future.
Ah, the possibilities.
Maybe someday soon ..... I'll muster up enough courage to share some of these mental fancies with you here.
Maybe :)
Until then and beyond, I'll be combing tangles out of hair and overcooking dinner chicken and scratching young backs and walking out this whole Mama thing - learning and growing along the way.
(Which is itself.... a dream realized, for sure.)
And all the while - I'll be thinking up things .....and asking the God of it all to hush what's from me and to highlight what's from Him.
Because dreaming dreams of our own making - there's really nothing magnificent about that.
But dreaming dreams that have been implanted and imparted by a creative God.....
.....those are the ones worth entertaining, don't you think?
Lord, help me to know the difference.
