Monday, April 27, 2009

Integrity in Me

The sweet little phrase "bloom where you are planted" is one that I've been concentrating on lately. It seems as if God has brought it to my attention one too many times for me to ignore it. For example, I opened up my Bible last night and randomly read Psalm 101. Another one of David's psalms - I quickly started to skim through it.....until I read the second part of verse 2:

I will lead a life of integrity in my own home.

It stopped me in my tracks. Seeing as though I'm a stay-at-home mama - it should.

This line from verse 2 makes me think about what integrity is and how I can put it on display even "in my own home". Even when no one is watching. To get a better grip on this - take a look with me at some synonyms for integrity. Wow....


And a few antonyms for integrity? Wow again....


(Ahem. One of the definitions of fragility is lacking substance; tenuous or flimsy. That very well could describe yours truly more often than I would care to admit. Is this hitting a little too close to home for anybody else? I'm squirming in my computer chair.)

To make this even more clear for myself - let's insert a few of those synonyms into the passage:

I will lead a life of my own home.
I will lead a life of my own home.
I will lead a life of my own home.
I will lead a life of my own home.
I will not lead a life of my own home.
I will not lead a life of my own home.

The whole "in my own home" thing is where this all gets serious. Living a life of virtue and purity and integrity while others are watching - is one thing. But living a life of virtue and purity and integrity in my own home with no one watching - is a God thing.

All this kinda kicks me square in my fanny.

So as I'm riding around this morning running errands, two songs I heard on our local Christian radio station totally captured the essence of all this integrity stuff.

The first one is "The Motions" by Matthew West.

I don't wanna go through the motions.
I don't want to go one more day
without your all consuming passion inside of me
I don't want to spend my whole life asking
what if I had given everything?
Instead of going through the motions.

Just going through the motions. All too often I just hurry my day along - going through my everyday grind - without pausing to see if I'm living my everyday life with passion. God's "all consuming passion" to be exact. How different my day might look if I approached my stay-at-home mom workday with conviction - giving it my utmost effort. It wouldn't only make a difference for me - but for all the other people and creatures living under my care. Something to think about.

The second one is a line from Life Light Up by Christy Nockels.

So let my life light up like the city lights
And let it burn for you in the darkest of night

And may I add...

in the dirtiest of laundry rooms
in the messiest of kitchens
in the weediest of gardens
on the most hectic playground
in the dustiest of living rooms
and so on...

I don't want to just go through the motions. I want to dance the heart out of every step I take. I want to thrive. I want to be a light. And as much as I'm able, I not only want to do my job with integrity and passion, but I want to do it joyfully. I want to be a Joyful JottinMama....everywhere. Yes, even in my own home.

I'm off to post Psalm 101:2 all over my house to help me do just that :)

Lord, make me good at what I do. Make me useful. Make me live a life of uprightness in my own home - with my own family - and even in my own mind. Let me be a light, Lord, to the ones I minister to day in and day out. Fill me with your all consuming passion. Help me to choose joy . Help me to choose soundness and purity and love and goodness over apathy and mediocrity. Help me to choose faith over flimsyness. Thank you for calling me out and chasing me down in the areas I need your guidance the most. In Jesus, Amen :)

*Synonyms and Antonyms from