Over the past few months I have been through the ringer with God on some things. While there are certainly many areas of my life that I would love some help with - it is the other areas, that I'm actually comfortable with, that God has chosen to change. Go figure.
Isn't it so like a human to feel comfortable in the pit? Sure - there are some pits that we hate, but isn't it true that we can actually become totally okay with certain sins in our lives? They can become companions. Bad ones, but nevertheless, a part of us. And we all too often just come to accept those unacceptable weaknesses. How unfortunate. Here are a few things that I feel like The Big Guy has been teaching me:
(Since I'm not good at being vulnerable, I will spare you the specifics of my sinfulness. Just know though, they are serious and if I were to continue in my nicely decorated pit - it would destroy me. )Let's get on with it:
I have been learning that if I let certain not-so-good things and ideas stick around, I will be missing out on some mighty good blessings from The Almighty. Yep. He has made it clear. If I choose to be stubborn and allow myself to dwell in the pit - I will no doubt be missing out. If I were to opt out of redemption and into condemnation - How could he allow me to experience all of the sweet stuff? Ya know that song by Rascal Flatts - 'Everyday' or something like that? There is a verse in that song that says:
"I drive myself crazy tryin' to stay out of my own way."
That says it perfectly. I need to move aside and let God release me from certain things so that I can move forward and relish in some goodness. If I choose not to (and if you choose not to, too) I'll never know what awesome things I could have been a part of. This brings me to another song. Chris Sligh sings a little diddy that says:
"Empty me of the selfishness inside
Every vain ambition and the poison of my pride
And any foolish thing my heart holds to
Lord empty me of me so I can be filled with you."
Amen, brother. I can so relate. All too often I allow myself to become someone who gets in her own dang way. And then, when I sit and wonder how I missed out on some really neat God-stuff, all I can do is blame myself. Oh, how I long to be a lady that can steer clear of certain temptations....a lady He can trust.
Lord, empty me of what comes between You and I. Don't let me get in my own way. Some sins are sticky - and I need you to help me scrub them off. And Lord, make me the kind of woman that wants to do right - not because I will be blessed - but because You will. In Jesus, Amen :)
